A Disease

  A DISEASE

(dedicated to the memory of  Dr. Deborah Gorham)

“At the time, people kept telling me,

‘If you put your little boy in day care,

 he’ll catch a disease!’” said the guest speaker

to the women at the community center.

In an adjoining room,

for the duration of the half-hour talk, 

a sitter supervised their children at play.

“But he was fine, stayed healthy

and learned social skills that have served him well.”

I was newly married, new to the city

where my husband worked.

Listening, I harboured a germ of hope.

to become like this historian

 with the glossy dark hair, confident air,

and passion for her work.

I was stunned by the social expectations

that marriage had brought down on me.

Everyone but my husband

wanted me to find a job, 

buy a house with a backyard

and have babies - A.S.A.P.!  STAT!

Any other path was pathological.

Were wedded bliss and a vocation incompatible?

Were my dreams a disease?

Forty years later,

the historian spoke to my book club

about her latest biography.

“It’s my last book,” she told us,

“I’m eighty now and retired.”

“I’m sorry!” someone said.

“We need more people like you to

help us understand the past.”

The professor turned to me and said with a smile,

“You still have her.”